Now more important to ask, & answer, RU OK?

It’s doubtful that anyone is going to look back on 2021 as one of the best years they’ve ever had. The challenges are numerous, unprecedented and difficult to resolve. Asking friends and relatives “Are you okay?” is more important now than ever.

But, what about when they ask you the question? It’s not an easy one to answer if you are not feeling okay.

Dr Glen Hosking, Senior Lecturer in Psychology, and Director, VU Psychology Clinic, says that it’s okay to not know how to answer. “Try not to pressure yourself to be able to fully articulate how you feel.

“It’s okay to say ‘I don’t know how to say this, but I’m struggling’ and let the conversation flow from there.”

Dr Hosking says that often people cannot identify why they are struggling with their mental health and this is quite normal. “There might not be an identifiable trigger or reason. Sometimes people struggle over everyday things, or feel on top of the world one day and desperately sad the next. These feelings are normal, but if they become overwhelming, it’s time to talk to a professional.

“Also, try to let go of thoughts that there might be a stigma attached to not being okay, or that you might be burdening others."

Most people feel a sense of relief after reaching out, he says. “It’s good to remind yourself that once you say you’re not okay, the relief will likely follow.”

When people offer to help, Dr Hosking says to try to be specific in your response. “Say things like ‘Can you text me every morning?’ or ask if they could do a specific task that would help you.”

RU OK? Day is on 9 September and the theme for 2021 is “Are they really OK? Ask them today”.

To coincide with RU OK? Day 2021, Dr Hosking is available to talk to students and staff about why asking is someone RU OK? is only the first step.